Our son RJ will repeat anything! As I am sure is no different from any other 5 year old. But, the trick is not to say anything that you would not want them to say.
So, we are riding through the neighborhood in the car letting the kids trick or treat. It is cold so they are in and out of the car as we go house to house. As we come up to this one house, my husband says without thinking, "alright, go get some candy from the grouchy man's house."
Ok, I must explain the reasoning behind this thoughtless comment. We have heard numerous unsolicited rumors about this guy since the day he moved in about how rude and unfriendly he is. One person says that they have had a door shut in their face, while others say he just won't even say as much as a "hello" when spoken to while out in the yard. Well, I guess somewhere amongst the rumors and gossip we let some of it sink in as truth even though we had not yet met the new neighbors ourselves.
Well, I bet you can guess what happened next! Yep, our innocent little five year old runs full speed to his front door with intentions of getting a hand full of candy while spilling the beans about what his daddy had just said about him in the car! Turns out he was the nicest guy up until the moment my son blurted out the words, "my daddy said we should come get candy from the grouchy man's house, and you are the grouchy man!" When they got back to the car I felt so small, and wanted to vanish from the car!
Here we were feeling like poop. We had never even met this guy and had just ruined that chance with a quick, thoughtless comment based on rumors. I am a firm believer in taking what people say with a grain of salt. I don't base my opinions on what others may say.
Well, to explain what happened next we first had to apologize to our son for the wrong choice we made in making a mean comment about someone, before we could dare tell him that what he had said to the guy was wrong. My husband then took RJ with him back to the neighbors house to apologize. He confessed that he had made that comment in front of our son and that it was wrong. Turns out they all had a great conversation and we now know for ourselves that he is not a grouchy man, but a really nice, understanding man.
This is why I really dislike gossip. Whenever I have even fallen into the gossip trap, someone always gets hurt and it is usually me too! All it does is open the door wide for the enemy to put up a wedge between me and others. I want my children to know that the tongue is a powerful weapon and we have to guard it carefully.
As surely as a north wind brings rain, so a gossiping tongue causes anger! ~ Proverbs 25:23
The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. ~ Proverbs 12:18
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